Number 4 is on the way, which would account for things being very quiet on the blog-front as of late.  The toilet and I are kinda besties right now.  And on good days I figure I better focus on my neglected children rather than blogging.  But to help get me through the rough first couple months I’ve been compiling a list to humor myself.  Life always seems a bit easier to handle if you can laugh at it, right?  I tried to keep the more graphic elements of my misery off the list, you know, because who wants to read about my toilet adventures?  Yeah, that’s what I thought.  So with this being my fourth rodeo, you’d think I would not have forgotten that…

1. The line between starvation and so full I want to cry is like… 3 bites.
2. The amount of time that passes between being so full I want to cry and starvation again is like… 10 minutes.
3. Much like when potty training a toddler- the first thing I am looking for when I walk through the doors of any public establishment is…. the bathroom.
4. How is it that something, which is apparently the size of an olive, is suddenly head-honcho around here- calling all the shots for a family of 5?! Yes that’s right dear family, its oatmeal for dinner again, EAT UP!
5. Since when were all the commercials about food?? …and since when did commercials about food make me cry? And since when did whatever Chef Pasghetti is making on Curious George make me salivate?
6. The amount of quality sleep I get between tossing and turning, aches and pains, potty breaks, bouts of nausea and toddler interruptions is like… less than I’ll be getting when I have a newborn.
7. The difference between being energized and ready to conquer the day and wanting to crawl in bed and call it a day is… getting 2 kids off to school in the morning.
8. I have to pee so bad i’m pretty sure my bladder is going to explode!  Oh wait… maybe it was just a trickle… and repeat.  Every hour, on the hour.
9. I could take a shower and do my hair and make up today… but then it would just smear all over my pillow at nap time…  And after all that work it would definitely have to be nap time.
10. I’m planning on wearing some version of stretchy pants, sweat pants, or pajama-wear for the next 5 months.  You can judge me.  Its ok.  I would probably judge you….because…

SOMEHOW I KEEP FORGETTING WHAT IT’S LIKE TO BE PREGNANT!!

*disclaimer: I hope my remarks are taken in good fun and are not offensive to anyone in any condition.  I know pregnancy is a special and sacred thing and I am grateful to be bringing another little spirit into the world.  Pregnancy has always been a very challenging experience for me, however, and I wouldn’t mind if the next 5 months flew by 🙂